Like most of my bad ideas, this one evolved in the course of a conversation I had with Dennis Chao regarding Human Computer Interaction and some of the lousy ideas that seem to prop up that field.  Dennis had mentioned some ideas that he read about, one of which involved a computer that reassures it's user.  One example of where this could be used is in spell checkers -- which usually interact with the user only when he makes a mistake.  The authors reasoned that it would be nice if the spell checker would do things like congratulate you for spelling difficult words properly.  Apparently, they believe that most people respond favorably to complements, even if they aren't sincere.                                 
Now personally I believe that people respond better to abject abuse than they do to insincere butt-kissing.  And so I proposed the Evil Clown OS extension.

The basic idea behind the Evil Clown is that at appropriate times, an Evil clown graphic would pop up from behind one of the user's windows and taunt her.  For example, say the user has tried to execute a file that doesn't exist on the system.  This would be a wonderful time for the clown to pop up and sneer, ``Hah! You don't even know what files exist on your machine!  Idiot!!!''  Or if she misspells a word, especially a common word, the Evil Clown could unleash on her with a torrent of childish insults.

If this were the case, it is likely that the user would eventually learn what files are on her machine, or how to type more carefully, thereby improving efficiency and productivity.  Similar techniques could be used to cut down on the amount of time a user spends, say browsing the web.

Now I do concede that some users may not find this approach to be very pleasing.  The constant taunts and jibes of the Evil Clown can bring back traumatic playground memories and further damage an already sensitive ego, thereby causing the user to fear her computer and therefore stop using it, leading to lost porductivity.  This is where Shaft comes in.
 
 
Shaft, as we all know, is the black private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks (shut your mouth).  He's a survivor of the mean streets and protector to all who need his strength.  Shaft will come to the rescue of the user if the frequency of Evil Clown appearances becomes too high.  At first we will only hear Shaft's theme music, wak-wakka-jawakka-jawaa.  This will make the Clown nervous at first, making his appearances less frequent.  But if the Evil Clown continues to appear, eventually Shaft will be forced to come on the scene.  ``Shut your damn mouth, you punk-ass clown!'' Shaft will holler.  ``username is doing just fine!  Now split, or I'm gonna hit you so hard it'll give your momma a black eye!''  The user now has a defender, an ally ... a friend.  She will form a bond with her computer, no longer afraid to use the machine, productivity will again soar.  Obviously, Shaft and the Evil Clown is a winner all around!

It is also my fervent hope that we will one day be able to work Gary Coleman into the mix.  But outside of exclaiming ``Whatchoo talkin' bout username?'' whenever the user enters a command that the machine can't properly interpret his use might be quite limited.